Invisible Dino

For a writing contest, The Marley and Me Writing Contest, I had to write a story up to 300 words, from the point of view of an animal. So, here you may view the stroy, brought to you by RFK International. Look At his name in the title(It literally says I am a dino)


I. A. Mad-ino, Invisible Dinosaur and Part Time Professional Pin The Tail On The Donkey Player
By rfk

Hi, I’m Isaac Albert Mad-ino, and I am an invisible dinosaur and part time professional pin the tail on the donkey player. But, I usually go by the name of I. A. Mad-ino, just because it is much shorter. So, let us get to the story, because I am getting tired of breaking the fourth wall.
Beep, beep, beep! The annoying noises faded away as I hit my alarm clock, accidently smashing it to pieces. "It was a waste of money anyway." I figured. I got up and walked to the bathroom. I brushed my razor sharp teeth, and combed my hair. I went to my closet and picked out my business suit: white shirt, black pants, a black necktie, and a leather belt. "That should do it" I said, as I opened the front door of my apartment and stepped out.
My car was a beat up sedan with rusted blue paint. "I can’t believe I spent forty two thousand dollars on this thing!" I said, recalling how I had purchased it from a man on the sidewalk who had a big, fluffy Afro. When I arrived at the ping pong factory I work at, I knew my life would change.
A big man, wearing an ‘80s like outfit, was holding a sign saying that the factory had been shutdown, and that all employees were fired. So, being an invisible dinosaur, I had myself some breakfast. I went home that evening, after playing a game of pin the tail on the donkey. I tried to cheer myself up with a video gaming session and some meatloaf eating contests, but I was still bummed out because I lost my car keys in a drain. And now, you know what a day in the life of an invisible dinosaur is like!

Homemade Ninja Throwing Stars

I was bored yesterday so I made some shurikens, aka ninja stars, out of blank CDs. I don't have a picture here yet, because I don't know how to transfer pictures from my camera. I currently have two stars, both custumized with my own symbol which spells my initials. When thrown they can go through and puncture paper (I used the kind of paper used for newspapers). I can pierce some cardboard, or sometimes they just bounce off. To make these suckers, all you have to do is take a permenant marker and draw your star design, cut it out, and optionally sharpen it. It takes less than five minutes to make one star.

I just had this random idea...

I just had this random idea, of two aliens playing a game of ping pong. So I sketched it:

Anyhow, I have this evolution project about what peoples will look like in 100,000 years. It is part science grade part art grade. My friend made a clay sculpture of what appears to be an Elite from the Halo series, with no clothes. So I raised my arms in the air, wagged them around and said: "Whys he naked?" a bunch of times. He thinks it was the most random est thing ever.

Fire Breathing Space Vampire With An Ak-47 Riding A pterodactyl

It is pretty awesome isn't it? I created in my sleep and then on the computer. Also, here is a picture of a Robot Ninja Pirate Zombie Dinosaur I drew (You can thank me later):

Top Ten Wacky Inventions of All Time

Don't we all love top ten lists? Here are the top ten most wack inventions-of all time, found by me:

10. The Vertebrae Bathroom Unit-More like a Swiss Army Knife than a bathroom.

9.Xythos revolver-The world's smallest gun!

8.Waterproof Towel-Get all the fun of a towel, yet your still wet in the end!

7.Automatic Ninja Dispenser-If you have any troubles, just insert 25 cents into the machine and you will have your very own ninja!

6.Exploding football-Just throw a touchdown pass to the other team's quaterback and you will have a much better chance at winning!

5.Pencil Sharpener-Awesome.

4.Assasinate Me Elmo-Comes with Abraham Licoln, Martin Luther King Jr., and John Lennon outifts.

3.Camera That Doesn't Work-Who doesn't like cameras that aren't cameras?

2.Paper-I like the taste.....

1.Cheese-Surely the only awesome thing to ever be produced from cows besides ice cream.

Awesome Blog Post

Image From BorkWeb

I found this blog post, http://borkweb.com/story/internet-and-awesomeness-diagram-a-technical-post, and I felt compelled to write a post about it. This page covers a lot of things I cover: Ninjas, zombies, dinosaurs, robots, pirates. It is just....awesome. So, I urge you to click on the link I provided earlier just because it is so awesome it made me tell you it was so awesome you had to read it.

Have You Been Wondering Where I've Been?

Well, I spent the night at my friend's house Friday, we played Halo 3 on Xbox Live basically all night. We also watched some Family Guy and Rush Hour 1. I went home Saturday and immediately went to get a haircut. Then I came and played Halo 3 (I was bored since I don't have Live), read some of Ask A Ninja Presents: The Ninja Handbook, and went to bed around 10:30. I woke up at 11:30 this morning and my family left to go to my little brother's hockey game. So I was sitting here, thinking for some weird, ravenous gym sock infested post, and I thought: "Hey, why don't I just tell the peoples wheres I been?". So there you have it. If you expected more, your out of luck, 'cuz any second now a panda trained in the art of kung fu is going to repeatedly through a car windshield while yelling "Skadoosh!".

Dinosaurs

I have had a interest in Dinosaurs since I was 3 or 4. I believe it started with the movie, Jurassic Park. Since then I have always liked big reptiles with teeth the size of a human head. My personal favorite is the Velociraptor, also known as "Raptors". Tyrannosaurus Rex is also a coolio, but Raptors are coolio-er. I mean, they are super fast, have a giant claw on each foot, have razor sharp teeth, guerilla warfare type hunting(Baiting then ambushing), and they are generally cool looking. Ever wondered why they went extinct? Here's my explaination: A metor struck the Earth. This caused giant clouds of dust to rise into the sky. This blocked out the Sun, which created an Ice Age type thing. So, the herbivores who die out because their food supply was frozen, and the carnivores would die out because the herbivores(their food source) died out. Then the snow melted and birds and mammals survived.

Who Do You Want To Take Over The World?

What would be more ideal: a zombie apocalypse or a robot uprising? Here's a simpler version: Do you want your flesh eaten or your entire body vaporized. I would personally go with the zombies. I have read The Zombie Survial Guide by Max Brooks, so I would more likely survive longer. I mean, it's easier to kill a zombie- off with its head. With robots it is a different story. One, they are made of metal. Two, the have laser things. Three, they are smart. Zombies are slow, cannot climb or run, cannot operate weapons, and they are made of decaying flesh. So, when the time comes, aim for the head!

You Smell Like Cheese

Hey. You know what you smell like? No, not Tag Body Spray. Cheese. Yeah, that's right. Cheese. What kind of cheese? Hm, I don't know. Maybe Swiss, or Cheddar, or even Parmesan. But that isn't really the point. The point is that you smell like cheese. You may not know it but.....you probaly smell like cheese right now as I speak. And there is nothing you can do about it. Well, you could water your fax machine or it will grown Parmesan cheese. But other than that, your're like a man stuck in a cage between a mob of zombies and a pack of ravenous gym socks.

Pirates or Ninjas?

Pirates or Ninjas? Who would win the fight? What would come of two of most awesome forces ever collided? I'll tell you what what come. The Ninja would win. Plain and simple. Nothing against Pirates though. What with all the "ARR!"s and the beards and the curved swords and the ship battles, they do some pretty sick stuff. But, now you're talking about Ninjas. NINJAS! Ninjas have a very large selection of killing devices, are masters of stealth and sneakiness, wear sweet black outfits(called guis), and they jump around and do flips and stuff. Now face that against a 240 pound bearded ruffian who drinks rum all day with a saber......Ninja. The Ninja would probaly hide behind him, stab him with several swords, throw shurikens at him, pull off a large amount of martial arts moves, and break his neck in a matter of seconds. Remeber, guns don't kill people, Ninjas do.....

Is the Moon Really a Death Star?

What if. The moon. Was actually a Death Star? I mean, they are the same shape and all the government would have to do to hide it from us is simply, powder it white. Just think, that at any one moment, it will activate and shoot some super green lasers at the Earth and BOOM! We all go buh-bye. That's not very fair. I think, that if we blow up the moon, we will rid the world of this major threat. Let's just hope Darth Vader is onboard.....